What The Fuck, America?


Rex Fido Rover Spot Tillerson is right: Trump is a moron who doesn't even know the territories of the country he is purportedly leading. To be fair, he probably learned about the United States from one of those dopey classroom maps which puts Alaska and Hawaii about where Mexico should be and totally leaves out the so-called Minor Outlying Islands of which we seem to own quite a few. (Although Navassa, at least, is in dispute with Haiti, as if that's a battle they can win. I say we let them have it and they can mine all the guano they want.)

The statement made by U.S. Virgin Islands deputy communications director Sam Topp is worth repeating: "I would not want to in any way involve the governor of the Virgin Islands in any national dispute in the media about what the president knows about the relationship between the United States and the U.S. Virgin Islands. It doesn't serve our purpose to participate in the national hoopla over whether Donald Trump is making competent comments or not. Just look at the documents that govern the relationship [between the United States and the U.S. Virgin Islands], and you can determine how relevant or irrelevant, or advised or ill-advised, his comments were. There's no president of the United States other than the president of the United States."

He's only wrong in one particular: There's no President of the United States at all, just a blast of hot air in a suit who is already threatening to pull FEMA out of Puerto Rico. At least he's willing to put everything on the line and...loan them more money. Considering his own bankrupt golf course is part of their previous debt this is very generous of him, don't you think?

I suppose all of it doesn't matter since scientists are pretty sure we only have another 7.6 billion years.

November 2016
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